208 Weight of the world

Worries. Total running time: 51 minutes 07 seconds (Stereo) MP3. Recording device: Zoom H2.

Click here to listen to this podcast.

207 Like a butterfly

I talk about Lawrence King’s death and wonder why. I ask you to give me the answers to this terrible tragedy. Total running time: 32 minutes 54 seconds. (Stereo) MP3.

Click here to listen to this podcast.

Hate

Fifteen year old Lawrence King was not a typical teen boy. Lawrence was openly gay and according to classmates in Oxnard, California, he sometimes wore makeup, high heels and other feminine attire to school. He would come to school wearing makeup and high heels, according to a male classmate. Another classmate said Lawrence’s appearance was “freaking the guys out”.

One recent morning Lawrence was shot in the head during a class in his school’s computer lab. Lawrence was raced to a local hospital where he was declared “brain dead”. The fourteen year old boy who shot Lawrence is being charged as an adult and will likely face hate crimes charges. The question? Why do things like this happen? The answer? 

Perhaps Lawrence’s foster parents did not consider his behavior to be a threat to others. During these early years of adolescence young boys are taught what is acceptable male behavior. What is acceptable in one family may be seen as shameful and unacceptable in another.

Lawrence’s attacker was allegedly the subject of Lawrence’s adoration. A recipe for a tragic outcome. One boy taught from an early age that a boy should like girls. Another sit free to discover his own feelings.

I can remember as a boy the shame of being gay. I hid that fact from all around me as best I could. In some ways I have to admire Lawrence for not bowing to shame. It would be nice to think that we live in a world where we all can feel free to openly acknowledge our gayness. Lawrence did and he paid the ultimate price. This is not the way it is supposed to be. But it is the way of this world. Gays challenge the definition of what it means to be male. And that challenge frightens many who look upon male homosexuality as a weakness.

Is it any wonder why there is such fear of male homosexuality in this world? When the majority are of the opinion that homosexuality goes against the natural laws of God. Is it any wonder that Lawrence’s attacker looked upon Lawrence with hate? A hate bred into him by an intolerant world of ignorant people. A hate that made it easy to put a gun to Lawrence’s head and pull the trigger. Lawrence’s young short life is over. There are other young men out there like Lawrence who just want to be free to be themselves. How many more will die before we learn to respect the precious nature of life?

206 Catwalk

Make me a Supermodel makes me want a guy. Total running time: 27 minutes 51 seconds (Stereo) MP3. Mic: Shure SM7B; Preamp: Presonus TubePre; Recording device: Garageband.

Click here to listen to this podcast.

205 Tranquility

Some of us can function better when medicated with the perfect pill. My friend is Gabitril. Its a drug prescribed to me by my doctor for anxiety. Despite its small size (2 Mg) it seems to have worked wonders for me. Listen as I talk from the parking lot in Opelika, Alabama. Total running time: 36 minutes 41 seconds. (Stereo) MP3. Recording device: Zoom H2.

Click here to listen to this podcast.

204 The Proposition

I talk about my new Zoom H2 recorder and an interesting proposition I had on Saturday night. Total running time: 31 minutes 25 seconds (Stereo) MP3. Recording device: Zoom H2.

Click here to listen to this podcast.

203 Undiscovered?

Are American Idol’s Top 24 really undiscovered singers? Not according to an article on the website, votefortheworst.com. Listen as I talk about this article and cutting down a sticker bush. Ouch! Total running time: 24 minutes 23 seconds (Stereo) MP3. Mic: Shure SM7B; Preamp: Presonus Tubepre; Recording device: Garageband.

Click here to listen to this podcast.

202 Be My Valentine

It’s not all bad. Especially when you have ppl who care. Happy Valentine’s day to you. Total running time: 50 minutes (Stereo) MP3. Mic: Shure SM7B; PreAmp: Presonus TubePre; Recording device: Garageband.

Click here to listen to this podcast.

Books: Arguing the Upside of Being Down

All Things Considered, February 11, 2008 · Author Eric G. Wilson has come to realize he was born to the blues, and he has made peace with his melancholy state.

But it took some time, as he writes in his new book, a polemic titled Against Happiness: In Praise of Melancholy. Click here to read the article. 

201 Running on empty

As I’m sitting here this Monday night once again I wonder if the pain in my left arm is the result of the torn ligament in my shoulder or a forewarning of a diseased heart. As I down two more aspirin I wonder. Why do I bother? Could it be that despite my sad pathetic existence and my reluctant participation in this life that I continue to have hope? Why do I delude myself into believing in better days? My life would be totally empty were it not for you. Those few people who listen to me here. Who have become like a partner in marriage – for better or for worse. I feel as if I am running on empty. That each new day is harder than the last. I worry about one solitary person on this earth who has affected me more than any other. But I feel helpless to help him. I don’t care about myself. I don’t know if I ever did. Perhaps that is why I am at this point in my life. An empty person who only exists because I know nothing else. If this is all there is to life then why was I brought here? If there really was a God surely he’d find it in his heart to show mercy and let me go. Instead he continues to complicate my life and force me to continue on and on and on. I am tired. I want to rest. My mind and my body aches. This isn’t the way it was supposed to be. Total running time: 24 minutes 24 seconds (Stereo) MP3. Mic: Shure SM7B; Preamp: Presonus TubePre; Recording device: Garageband.

Click here to listen to this podcast.

200 It’s just another day

I’m recording my 200th podcast today. Woo hoo! It’s just another day. I talk about sex near the end of this podcast. Total running time: 49 minutes 25 seconds (Stereo) MP3. Click on the link in the right sidebar under the “Nick Thomas Podcast” to listen. Mic: Shure SM7B; Preamp: Presonus TubePre; Recording device: Garageband.

199 The day after

After a little talk about what I did today on my personal day off I launch into a rant about podcasting and gay podcasters with some specific and pointed examples. Warning! I am a big ole bitch in this podcast. You might not wanna listen to this one. Total running time: 56 minutes 54 seconds (Stereo) MP3. Click the link in the right sidebar under the “Nick Thomas Podcast” to listen. Mic: Shure SM7B; Preamp: Presonus TubePre; Recording device: Garageband.

Next podcast on Wednesday

I’m going to take a break from podcasting this evening so I can watch as the results of tonight’s election come in from across the country. I’ll record tomorrow evening. Go Obama!

198 Man’s best friend

A myriad of topics in this one including: Bestiality, Alien life-forms living in the world’s oceans, listener emails and comments, the Presidential race, the bible. A hodgepodge of scattered thoughts. Total running time: 46 minutes 52 seconds (Stereo) MP3. Click the link in the right sidebar under the “Nick Thomas Podcast” to listen. Mic: Shure SM7B; Preamp: Presonus TubePre; Recording device: Garageband.