I talk about why I don’t want you to be angry with me. Mic: Shure SM7B; Mixer: Mackie DFX6; Recording device: Garageband. Total running time: 47 minutes 05 seconds. Right click here to download this podcast.
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A guy on adam4adam left me a nice message today regarding my profile:
“I for one want to thank you for your post! I think we ALL have been naive, at least i have. I just tested neg but honestly it could have been the other way. I just wanted to let you know that your post had a impact on me and is making me rethink the way i approach what i am doing! Your a good guy for posting it!! Thanks”
The profile he’s referring to is my updated adam4adam profile and it reads:
“Tested positive on 02-10-2012. I blame myself for this. I prefer to believe that the guy who infected me didn’t know. But you can’t assume you are negative just because you are healthy. I always asked my sex partners status. Perhaps I was naive. To trusting. I guess, in retrospect, I was. The only way to play is to play safe. Never take anyone’s word. I did and now I will have to live with this for the rest of my life. Get tested.”
Kudos for getting on with life.
As to the dread about experiencing a colonoscopy. I wouldn’t mind experiencing another one because I was unable to remain awake during my first and only one as the physician watched his probe on the monitor. The 1.5 to 2 days preparation was awful – the repeated diareah to cleans the colon until only clear liquid came out. Achieving sufficient liquid intake so as to not become dehydrated and taking in sufficient calories via clear liquid, to not feel weak, was challenging.
Nick,
As you already know I have cronical pain and have to take heavy painkillers and had the same problem As you have!
Constipation is a commonly reported effect associated with the use of prescription painkillers. Whether taking opiates at therapeutic levels or abusing them, many users report sluggish bowel movements, a condition which can be both annoying and painful. The problem can be compounded if patients are taking a combination of prescription medications. Opiates can interfere with normal elimination by relaxing the smooth muscle in intestines and preventing them from contracting and expelling waste. With regular use of opiates, stools can become rock hard, blocking the bowels. In severe cases, bowels can rupture, leading to sepsis or death. Symptoms of constipation include: abdominal bloating, swelling and cramping; straining to pass stool; pain, discomfort or blood with a bowel movement; nausea; weight loss; and decreased appetite.
Your doctor should have given you something to make your bowel Movements increase!
If you need some advice what you can do yourself instead of taking meds.. Just let me know!
From now on you have to treat your body as temple!
By changing your eatinghabits und start doing sports it will help to reduce your painlevel!
Try it and it does Not cost you anything more then discipline and good will!
… Am sure that you do NOT have cancer! .. But go and see the doc and let him run the tests and you will Know for sure!
Hugs!
Michael from Germany
You’re right in that a definitive diagnosis of cancer of the large bowel is best obtained by a colonoscopy so, although a CT scan would be able to detect other issues, having just the endoscopy does make sense if colorectal cancer is a concern. It did the trick for me – that’s how mine was determined.
As a Brit with a National Health Service to call upon when I get sick I find it awful that being able or not to pay medical fees has a bearing upon whether a person can get treatment or go undiagnosed. President Obama knew what he was talking about.
I had quite a few colonoscopies during my five years of follow-up care & they’re not anywhere as awful as would be imagined. In the U.K. they’re carried out under some sedation meds – just enough to ease any anxiety and discomfort. And it is more discomfort than being painful. As hawaiian_maile says, the bowel prep stuff they give you most certainly clears you out – I found that part the most inconvenient….. spending the day before the ‘scope mostly in running for the bathroom. It’s very important to fully carry out the clinic’s instructions about the prior bowel prep as otherwise it’d be a bit of a wasted journey if the doctor can’t see the interior of ya plumbing clearly.
I actually saw my own tumour ‘cuz I was laying on the gurney watching the monitor along with the surgeon as he advanced the scope. Being in the hospital business as I am, I had a certain degree of professional interest in the proceedings having worked in endoscopy suites before. I’m told that my reaction as the tumour came into view was “Oh Fuck”.
Try not to worry, Nick, it’ll be all right & you’ll be fine.
Big Hugs.
Don’t be angry with me darling if I fail to understand
All your little whims and wishes all the time
Just remember that I’m dumb I guess like any foolish man
And my head stays sorta foggy cause you’re mine
Well I recall the first time that I flirted with you dear
When I jokingly said come and be my bride
Now that time has turned the pages it’s the sweetest joke on earth
That I have you here, forever by my side
Maybe someday you’re gonna hurt me I’ve been hurt in love before
Only God can know and time alone will tell
But in the mean time I’ll keep loving you with all my heart and soul
And pray God to let it last if it’s his will
So don’t be angry…
Some comments to this podcast…
Regarding the guy on Adam4Adam that still wants to fuck you regardless of your status, there are a lot of guys that think they can’t get HIV from topping. While it is true that the bottom is at a higher risk, it should not be considered zero risk being a top. You don’t have to live without anal intercourse but you do need to practice safe sex by using condoms. There are multiple strains of HIV. Having more than one strain makes it much more difficult to control through treatment.
Regarding oral sex. I’ve come to believe that you can catch HIV from oral sex. I’m constantly biting the inside of my mouth, and frequently have a sore throat from snoring and allergies. The potential for a blood/semen interaction in those areas increases the potential. I’m not saying it’s as risky as anal sex, but I do believe there is some risk here too.
I think you did the right thing cancelling the CAT scan. I believe that since you mentioned a concern that you might have cancer, the Dr. had to rule it out and ordered a CAT scan to cover her liability. I think a colonoscopy is the best method of determining what is going with your intestinal difficulties. If you haven’t already had one, you’re due. At our age it becomes something you have to do every 3-5 years. My bet is on the Tramadol and your diet.
Finally, you could drive yourself crazy trying to figure out who infected you. You are just going to have to let that go. You may find out someday, or you may never know. What would you do with the information if you do?
Hugs…
Jeff
Houston, TX
Jeff, I’m not overly concerned who infected me. I’m not going to shoot him or n e thing! Lol. Just wish everyone would get tested. Bottom line. I did this to myself.